Isn't it time all these clubs, players and agents just did whatever the hell they gotta do to get us where it says on the ticket? When this column is appointed president of Fifa, a blanket ban on transfer speculation, baseless or otherwise, will be one of its earliest sweeping reforms. An insightful man, Seinfeld also had the inherent ridiculousness of the transfer system covered long before football's biannual trolley dashes were introduced. "The players are always changing, the team can move to another city … you're actually rooting for the clothes. It's as if not caring about such matters means we mustn't actually like football, when nothing could be further from the truth.
Premier League summer signings ranked at halfway point of window
Approaching the halfway point of the summer transfer window, around £1bn has already been spent so far by Premier League clubs. Could this summer see Premier League clubs break the current record of £1.615bn from last summer's window? How do you rate the Premier League's spending this summer? Everton have been the busiest club so far, signing 11 players as a part of Ronald Koeman's project to form his own squad. We've picked out some of the standout arrivals - have your say and vote below for your signing of the summer so far.This content may collect you by Max Nolan
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